Well, ladies, here's the update on "the fella". I'm sitting here drawing a complete blank. Maybe that's the right answer anyway. We did go to that art show and we did have a good time, but ...........oh geez, he just isn't for me. I genuinely like him, but I have no chemistry feeling whatsoever and never will. Funny part is, he picked me up at 6 and we went to the art gallery and then back to my house for wine and food. We talked a blue-streak just like it's been from the beginning and before we knew it, it was 4 in the morning. The awful part was at the door saying goodnight. He leans in for t-h-e-k-i-s-s and yuck. Now on HIS face was this rapturous look and starry eyes and he says, "You just don't know what you do to me". Oh good Lord. All I could do was pat him on the shoulder (yes, right on the shoulder) and say I had a nice time and really needed to get some sleep. He leaves and goes home. He calls. He won't let me off the phone. Finally I go to bed. The next morning he calls, and that afternoon twice, and then that night for 2 more times. That's 5 calls. And let's add a few more emails to that, too. All I could think was, 'just put a bag over my head and smother me to death'. I know, I should smack myself for being so insensitive, but I didn't throw up my hands in frustration in front of him. I was nice and polite. So Sunday rolls along and there's the first morning call. I told him I wasn't feeling well, had a whopper headache, and would get back with him when I was better. A few hours go by and the phone is ringing again. He wanted to know if he could bring me anything or if it would help if he just sat with me. Ohhhh, give me strength. Of course I thanked him and said no but that evening rolled around and the phone rang yet again. By this time I really did have a headache. I told him (again) that I would phone him when I felt better. He sounded crushed. THEN he adds to that by saying, "You know, Jen, you're really a good kisser". I thought I was either hearing the joke of the year or I was in some kind of dream where I couldn't wake up. That darn kiss, if you could even call it that, was less than a whisper of a touch on the lips and do you know, I actually told him that. Didn't matter a whit. He said he just loves gentle kisses like that. I'm going to throw up just typing about this. My cat, Sam, is better with the lips (hear that, Carole?). Well, all this leads to today. More calls, more emails and finally I said to him, "You know R, isn't it nice that we will be such fast friends? It's always good to make a new friend and you can never have too many." There was a long pause as you can imagine. Then....guess what he said. He said, "I bet I could change your mind if I came over today." I'm telling you ladies, I am going to have a problem here. He doesn't give up and the more he talks, the more I want to RUN. He means well I know, he's just not in any way, shape, or form for me. Now I remember why I made that pact with myself to not date anymore. I'm happy and content by myself, with my cats, my wildlife, and my friends (male and female). I must be one selfish woman to not want a guy that hangs all over me and would breathe for me if he could. It's just too much. Ok, I've vented and now you know what happened and hopefully old R will settle for a nice friendship. Hopefully.
So in signing off this post tonight, I'll leave you with my regular oh so perfect kisses, LOL (sorry)
XOXOXO
Oh dear Jenny, sorry but I cant help but laugh at some of this. Poor you and Poor R, bit of a dilema, think you will have to be totally honest and maybe you can just be friends, as they say, but somehow it seems unlikely. Nita xx
ReplyDeleteGracious, girl, bless your heart! Clearly, you knocked the socks off that guy which doesn't surprise me. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm really at a loss for words here, and that's unusual. It's been so long since I've had a situation even similar, I have no advice unless perhaps you want to move with me to Two Egg. :)
I hope that this guy doesn't turn into a stalker. There can always be too much of a good thing and he sounds as if he has developed a gigantic crush on you. You may have to use some plain talking with him.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Beth
Do you know some other woman that would love some attention? This guy sounds very nice, but he just can't take a hint can he?
ReplyDeleteYou might need to be a bit more direct with R. And be careful. Some men are just as needy and clingy as some stereotypical women.
ReplyDeleteI am going thru the same thing...and I have done a few times before this one. This one at least seems to have backed off some. But with one iota of encouragement he would be right there agaon.
ReplyDeleteBeth is right..and so is the Gaelic Wife. he seems needy and clingy and that's a little scary.
I feel the same..I am happy kissing my little one here and if that particular spark happens (sometimes is has..inappropriately! Dang!) I'll be all over Mr. Right like white on rice.
In other words, I feel your pain. :-)
LMBO.. poor R.. sounds like he is a persistent soul to say the least. I understand what you mean by being content with your life now though. Tell him point blank that you're not interested in love but you enjoy his friendship and would love to help him find love if that's what he needs. (surely someone out there meets his clingy criteria! lol)
ReplyDeleteHi, Jen,
ReplyDeleteI'm unfamiliar with Blogger after all this time, not sure where to pm you. My blogspot URL is debs bookends...don't expect much, it's still a work in progress ;-)
Deb
PS, A guy who can't take the hints you gave him probably doesn't deserve much more politeness ;-)
Jenny, I have all sorts of red flags waving in the back of my mind after reading this entry.
ReplyDeletePlease be very careful; this guy seems awfully aggressive.
Thinking of you...
Yep Jenny this guy does sound too needy and clingy. I personal can't stand guys like that I like my space. My hubby is so not needy or clinging. Yep I would cut the ties with this guy soon. When he starts saying he could come over and change your mind, he must think he is God's gift to women yet at the same time shows just insecurity in his self with calling you always. Yep I would cut this one loose fast and gently. I don't like that mix in a guy. Even a normal well adjusted guy that you were attracted to would have gotten the message by now that you weren't interested. Hope you figure it all out. Have a great rest of the week. Hugs Carrie
ReplyDeleteWell,Jenny, everyone has already said what is running thru my mind - dump him, gently though.
ReplyDelete"R. you are such a good man and have so much to offer a woman - however there just isn't any chemistry here, and I don't want to waste your time - so please go for some other woman who will love you for who you are."
A friendship with him will probably never work cause he will think eventually you won't be able to resist him. (male ego, you know!!)
I'm not surprised by his reaction, though - you are so charming and I remember your pics - gorgeous. Keep us all posted !!
Dori! My word! Where have you been? .....and I see you still aren't blogging. Good grief, why not? Good to see you back regardless :) (but start blogging, lol)
ReplyDeleteHave you dumped Mr. Wrong yet I hope? It's hard..I know it is..been there and usually waffle so much that alone sends 'em packin'.
ReplyDeleteOK.... I cheated... I read the blog! Sounds like you made a much better impression than you should have. But, then again, that "little smooch" could have knocked your socks off, and you'd be the one calling him!
ReplyDeleteI think we all have had similar experiences in our lives. Kind of makes my skin crawl to remember it!
Hope he doesn't know about your blog on here! But, he just might "get the hint" if he read it.
Hope you don't mind, I was bouncing around some of the sites others see and read this. I too am a little leery of his persistance. One can never be too careful.
ReplyDeleteHi Jenny..
ReplyDeleteoh my.. sounds like you really impressed this man..to much so.. I have to agree with the rest here.. just be polite but firm.. tell him how you really feel.. and you only want to be friends.
but I doubt friendship will work with this one..
I also wanted to thank you for such a lovely comment you left for me.. your right we do have a great group of blogger friends here.. and I am so blessed to have come across your path..
you are a dear.. and a joy to visit..
will keep you in prayer over this matter with your friend..
stay safe.. be strong.. and things will be just fine..
soft hugs
Well, I don't know wether to smile or weep a little here my friend. I have been in a situation like this before and my gosh how I hated the whole thing...worse I didn't even have friend feelings for the person I'm talking about...UGH! I pray you'll find grace for this and are able to come around to the other side and not feel bad about it all. Now let me say thank you so very much for your comment on my space today. I humbly and respectfully appreciate it so much. I don't take it lightly...and I don't need to call and e-mail a few thousand times to prove that I hope LOL!
ReplyDeleteYou are so cute. I had to laugh Jenny because it is going to be laughable for you once you get rid of him and for good. If you change sites let me know. My goodness girl you have charm and beauty we all know that but you did get a clingon and he better get it.
ReplyDeleteYou gave me smiles today with this one and just know your right. Bring on Mr Right. He is there. Lets go and find him.
Bless you today.
I can only imagine how repulsed you are and I have to agree that you are right and sorry you had to go though this . Its life and protect yourself. Your lady and we need to do what we have to.
ReplyDeleteSome cling on was stocking me via facebook thought the network blogs. I removed myself and and had to stop following all I had been but I too got creeped out and big time . So I validate what you say here. and Jenny dont ask why I didnt put this all in one comment . You have my mind going and I must be feeling better.
xoxox and Hugs
Hi, Jenny - tnks for noticing that I resurrected - just hanging here in AZ.
ReplyDeleteI think that R is a velcro stud muffin - the velcro describes how he affects you - the other two words are what he thinks of himself !! I have a Bichon dog and she is definitely a velcro dog - and that's ok with dogs, but not with men ~~ Hello! Women have been freed - we can even vote now !!
I have toyed with starting a blog but fear no one would read it cept me (and my velcro dog cause she would be on my lap peering at the monitor).)
Keep us posted,hon.
Jenny everytime I see you around I look twice. I like your new SP. Very pretty .
ReplyDeleteRest well tonight my friend and lets find Mr. Right.
Smiles and Hugs
He sounds like someone who could turn into trouble. He obviously doesn't take a hint, so maybe a "tap" upside his thick skull with your purse might help? It sounds really funny to read about the non-stop calls and emails, but I do know it gets old VERY fast. I had a stalker like that and ended up in the hospital when he tried to strangle me because I just couldn't love him the way he wanted. Please be careful. We've just "met" but I sure don't want to lose your friendship. :) I promise, you don't even need to show off your wonderful kissing skills to me! :p
ReplyDeleteLOLLLLLL, you guys are cracking me up! Some of these comments have been the funniest ever and I love 'em.
ReplyDeleteTo Dori: Start that blog and don't even worry about readers. When I started over on WLS, I didn't have even one reader for I'll bet 6 months or more. Then, it was disheartening, but now I laugh about it. Here's what you do: start the blog, start a follow with me, then go to my great group and their great groups...well, not too fast because it's hard to keep up. But when you make a comment, just come out and say it. Tell them you're going to follow them and you'd love for them to follow you. You'll have a whole gaggle of guys and gals and then you, too, will get to stay up ALL night long and blog walk and type, lol. Oh the misery of the fingers hahahaha.
Jenny dear - thanks for the tips on starting my own blog - but in the meantime, I'm following yours! Love your new pic - still a gorgeous gal you are !
ReplyDeleteSince I started reading blogs a few years ago - we have lost Ellen, Curtis (still cannot believe it) and Jacque's husband, Dave !! Pam is getting a divorce and who knows what's next - even soap operas don't have this much drama!